Phillies Wives Faceoff
This is a tough one. In one corner, you have Cole Hamels’ wife Heidi, former Survivor: The Amazon contestant, who appeared in Playboy. However, she is batshit crazy… you almost feel bad for Cole (almost). She wants to adopt multiple children from Africa and then use their names to buy African land… which supposedly will save Africans. I’m not even making this up, she explained it in detail during a TV interview.  You have to wonder if she got a spam email from a Nigerian prince and thought it was the real thing. Either way, I only almost feel sorry for Cole because, yes, although she is insane, she is also insanely hot. Exhibit A to the right, from her Survivor days.
In the other corner, you have Jen Utley, who has decided to champion a less insane cause… saving puppies. Yes, Jen puts her time in at the local SPCA and drags Chase and his fistfuls of dollars with her. But, I think puppies would be easier to care for than a bunch of African kids. Just a hunch. Either way, in some of her pictures she looks like Angelina Jolie, and I think that speaks for itself. I don’t really know anything else about Jen… and her name is so common that all a Google search tells me is that she is either a senior majoring in journalism and political science at Chico State University, a member of the Cincinnati Shambhala Meditation Group, or an obsessive Houston Dynamo soccer fan. Or maybe all three.
Some more pictures for your review, of both Heidi, Jen, and other Phils wives after the jump…
Heidi Hamels (wife of LHP Cole Hamels)
Â
Â
Â
Â
Â
Â
Â
 ![]()
Jen Utley (wife of 2B Chase Utley)
Â
Â
Â
 ![]()
Heidi Dobbs (wife of Greg Dobbs)
 ![]()
Kim Myers (battered wife of RHP Brett Myers)
 ![]()
Michelle Burrell (wife of LF Pat Burrell)
Â
Â
Â
 ![]()
(Is it just me or does Michelle look a little like Alyson Hannigan?)
Posted: August 13th, 2007 under Sports.
Comments: 26
Comments
Comment from ryser2k
Time: August 13, 2007, 12:30 pm
Post your favorite Phillies wife here. Write-in votes accepted, but include pics!
I think I’ll go with Jen Utley, but I’m allergic to dogs so that whole SPCA thing will have to end.
Comment from Hank
Time: August 13, 2007, 7:15 pm
and my pick….heidi dobbs…although i choose the right to revoke this pick should any new information come forward.
Comment from ryser2k
Time: August 13, 2007, 7:20 pm
Heidi Dobbs does have a kid… but these things can be… taken care of.
Comment from Marie
Time: August 14, 2007, 9:29 am
Thank you for having the guts to say what I couldn’t to my girlfriends, ’cause they thought Cole and his wifey’s idea was just sooooo cuuuuuute: Heidi Hamels is a total freaking nutbar. I saw that interview too, and I was so embarassed for the both of them I had to watch it through my fingers.
Comment from ryser2k
Time: August 14, 2007, 11:21 am
“Total freaking nutbar” just made me laugh out loud… that pretty much sums her up. I just want to know how a woman gets that crazy… where’s the voice of reason in her life?
Comment from Marie
Time: August 14, 2007, 12:33 pm
OH! I forgot something: Did you catch how they said in that interview “our parents wouldn’t let us do anything too crazy?”
So I guess “having cantaloupe-sized implants bolted to my chest and getting naked on national TV for peanut butter and Oreos” and “getting in a bar fight and breaking my pitching hand punching a dude out” don’t qualify as “crazy” in the Strobel and Hamels households? Good to know.
(More to the point of this post: Though Heidi Dobbs is quite beautiful, I have to pick Jen Utley, because I met her once and she and I had a chuckle over obsessive Phillies Phans, and she told me she liked my purse.)
Comment from ryser2k
Time: August 14, 2007, 1:24 pm
As one of those obsessive Phillies Phans, I just hope that someone knocks some sense into Cole before Heidi sends him totally off the deep end. The man has some talent, we Phils fans have been waiting for the second coming of Lefty and he could be it… or he could end up the next Mitch Williams.
Or maybe the next Darren Daulton, travelling between different dimensions while he awaits the end of the world on December 21st, 2012, at 11:11 a.m.
Comment from Hank
Time: August 14, 2007, 9:40 pm
Dutchie was on Daily News Live…man, talk about batshit crazy. Heidi and Dutchie should get together. They can try to save kids in different dimensions.
Comment from kristine
Time: August 16, 2007, 9:22 pm
I pick Jen Utley from one pet lover to another.
Pingback from coalcracker.net » There Goes My Traffic
Time: October 12, 2007, 2:07 pm
[...] that the Phillies season has ended it seems that interest in the players’ wives has disappeared. My blog’s traffic has returned to the dark reaches of the 10-hits-a-day [...]
Comment from philliephan
Time: December 20, 2007, 3:33 am
Jen Utley’s maiden name is Jennifer Cooper. Maybe that will help with your next google search.
Michelle Burrell’s maiden name is Michelle Fonseca and you already know Heidi’s maiden name.
Comment from phannnn
Time: December 28, 2007, 9:35 pm
just wondering…
where was the interview with heidi?
and what did jen say to you about obsessive fans?
and i’d have to go with either heidi dobbs or michelle
Comment from ryser2k
Time: December 30, 2007, 12:47 pm
I think the Hamels interview was on Daily News Live or a Phillies pregame show on Comcast Sportsnet… it’s been a while but I remember the interviewer was Leslie Gudel.
Comment from phannnn
Time: January 2, 2008, 10:20 pm
thanks
Comment from Hank
Time: January 15, 2008, 9:31 pm
Oh wow, activity on this post. Wooo. Hopefully there will be a 2008 edition.
Pingback from coalcracker.net » Top Posts
Time: March 30, 2008, 8:34 pm
[...] Hank: Oh wow, activity on this post. Wooo. Hopefully there will be a 2008 edition. [...]
Comment from Jess
Time: April 13, 2008, 3:19 pm
Usually I wouldn’t speak up but after reading all the bashing I felt that I had to…you guys are crazy…Heidi is the shit. I’ve had a few classes with her, she is so genuine, sweet, and passionate about what she does. Oh yeah and she’s ridiculously gorgeous. So, sorry that she’s had more crazy, amazing adventures in her life than you pathetic whiners will ever have…it’s amazing what kind of claws jealousy will bring out in people (for the girls wanting to be her…for the guys wanted to get closer to her)!
Have fun posting on the internet whining about people whose lives you can only dream about…
![]()
Comment from ryser2k
Time: April 14, 2008, 2:49 pm
Can’t believe this post is still getting comments! Anyway, I don’t think anyone here was saying she’s not a nice person or that she doesn’t have good intentions. Her comments on the interview over a year and a half ago, though, were naive to say the least. Maybe she has matured a bit since then. I certainly hope so, because if Cole keeps pitching like he has been this season, he’ll be making the big bucks soon enough. I’d like to see him and Heidi put it to good use!
Comment from Jess
Time: April 14, 2008, 6:19 pm
Okay Ryser I’ll give you that…truce ![]()
Pingback from Best Player in Baseball « BaseballHappenings.com
Time: June 5, 2008, 7:59 am
[...] Player in Baseball Posted on June 5, 2008 by davidbloom Chase Utley of the Phillies is showing he is the real deal in 2008. Well, we have known that a while now. Utley’s 2007 [...]
Comment from Jordan
Time: July 6, 2008, 5:32 pm
Well, I came on here looking to find out about Pat’s wife cause I found out he got married, and yes, she is banging. But my choice would have to be…kim myers. if she can take a beating, she can take anything in bed.
I remember seeing David Bell’s wife on Daily News Live and I remember her being extremely hot but I could never find a picture of her. I may also be mistaken
Comment from emily & annemarie
Time: July 28, 2008, 12:09 am
mmkay, lets see.
Jen Utley is a crazy nut bar who controls poor Chase and forces him into eating all this CRAP! Also, if you watch interviews with Chase, he is really. . .taken aback by this whole “lets save the puppies” crap. “I don’t know, it was my wife’s dream, and all of a sudden I’m here. . .” -Chase Utley.  in another interview, you heard Jen yell at him as she insisted that Chase was a cat person. CONTROL FREAK!!
Heidi. What is to be said about her? She is a slut. Cole clearly didn’t have his hormones in check when he met her. He was 22 and she was a playboy model. I mean come on! How can a guy resist that??? It’s only a matter of time before Heidi looks like a grandmother and Cole realizes what he did.
Heidi Dobbs. She is pretty good. A bit on the fake side I think, but all and all, a fairly good woman. Good job, Greg. Well at least compared to what these other boys have chosen. . .
Michelle. Two words for you: Slut! gold digger! I mean, look at the lady. Notice how she has gained A LOT of weight as their relationship progresses. Seriously. She was a stick and now she is a freaking water buffalo. Apparently, before she got to Pat, she had been with many other baseball players. GOLDIGGER!!! Pat better watch out. Sooner or later, she will leave him, take all of his money, and he will be left with nothing but a fork.
Someone, please, talk some sense into these men!!! HELP THEM!!!
Comment from ryser2k
Time: July 28, 2008, 10:36 am
Awesome comment, I was cracking up the whole time
Comment from emily & annemarie
Time: July 28, 2008, 10:40 am
Haha, thanks. Were we right, or were we right??
Comment from Jen Utley
Time: August 7, 2008, 3:01 am
DO YOU HAVE MATT CAPPS?
NO, I TURNED CAps lock off a while ago.
Comment from Marcy Goldberg
Time: August 15, 2008, 11:00 pm
you people need to get a life
Write a comment